Presenting Sucks

Yes, this is true, for me anyway. I don’t know what it is except I get up there and my head fills with noise, my mouth goes dry and I forget what I really, really, really want to say. The real essence of my message gets lost in the fact I need to perform in front of a large audience. Now that sucks!

Over the last two days I was part of an amazing hui with the VPLD. What is so great about this group is we all have the same interest of doing better in this world of education. It is a supportive, kind, caring group and is all about mentoring each other. In fact mentoring is the essence of the group, it is the foundation of which the group was built on. Each one of us had a 3 minute slot to talk about what we had learnt in the past year. Here is the real message of my presentation which was lost with my nerves.

I learnt such a lot from the wonderful people in the room which enhanced my thoughts on what is important in my work. There was one message that stood out for me the most and this came from a number of people. Take care of yourself, take time with nature – biophilia and don’t forget the truly important things – yourself and your family.

The important stuff in our lives is who we are, our work is what we do. Getting a good balanceIMG_6615 in this world of education is surprisingly our biggest challenge. Getting it right is so,so,so important because one day, our work will finish and will be gone. That important stuff will always be there, will always need us and deserve us more than our work.

I have decided I will never get up and present in front of a large audience again. Not for my work anyway. I love sharing what I do, I love talking about what I do, I love listening to others about what they do and I love what I do. Presenting is just not my thing.

I have been pondering this little dilemma since flying home yesterday, it woke me early this morning and now I am at my computer at 6am on a saturday morning while everyone sleeps. I needed to do this to clear my head so I could give my all to my family and hobbies before Monday comes around again. I am good with it. I can still share here. I still have the next 6 months to talk with my mentor and I will always have my school colleagues to share with.

Perhaps I could  become a mentor……mmmm…..

Melanie M

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Inspiring Leadership

Inspiring Leaders

One of my professional goals for this year was to inspire leadership in the teachers and students around me. I didn’t know how I was going to achieve this,  I just knew it was something that was a big part of my beliefs as a leader.  I also felt that our students would benefit from this. We have identified our students as passive learners because they haven’t been a part of the learning process the learning has been done to them.  In my research I have discovered that children who plan their own goals, set weekly schedules  and evaluate their own work build up their frontal cortex and take more control over their lives.

I very quickly learnt to build this capacity with my teachers I needed to accept that I was no longer  the person solving and doing everything. This was important to me because I knew that was exactly what we were doing to our learners which increased their passiveness towards their learning. I wanted my team to start leading themselves. When I first wrote my professional goal I pondered how I would evaluate this and my mentor and I came up with ‘When we see both teachers and student leading others’. Students are now running workshops and our teachers are researching and presenting to the staff. As a team we have been researching how boys learn and developing our understanding of the Innovative learning Environment we are creating collaboratively for our students. This is what we learnt, shared and used in our practice.

These are some little gems that I have discovered on my journey of inspiring leadership in those around me:

  • Allow my colleagues to solve their own problems with me walking beside them.
  • By listening with intention I am valuing what others have to say.
  • Notice the treasures in front of me and and allow them to shine on their own.
  • Let others know what a great job they are doing
  • Giving time to others is a valued gift.

“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.” Helen Keller

Melanie M

Am I Done

 

I wrote this post at the end of last year. I have no idea why I didn’t post it. Maybe because it is so honest. I have returned this year thoroughly refreshed, ready for a new start and have a strong focus of not allowing my work to crush me in the way I felt at the end of last year. I felt crushed as a person and as an educator. As the school year ended I headed over to England to be with family to celebrate christmas, new year, a wedding and to farewell a dear person in my life who had passed. As I was driving to the airport, I didn’t have a song in my heart, I wasn’t excited about my new adventure or could I smile. Then I got a work email which shook the ground I walked on. Why was I even looking at my work emails, I do not know. The person who sent it had been giving me grief for a couple of days. The content of the email  was unnecessary, it wasn’t important, life changing or would make a difference if I had sorted it that day or in the New Year. I felt miserable and I shouldn’t have. I remember the moment when I felt some excitement about my journey, it was about 1.30am just as I was walking towards my plane. I took a photograph of my cabin bag and neck cushion in the airport bar and wrote ‘finally excited about my trip’.

I hope this year ends on a better note and I walk away from here with a skip in my step and song in my heart because I wont be able to do that again.

December 13, 2015

Ok, I have a confession I am really bad at keeping my blog up to date. I have many excuses and none worthy of putting up here. I am not going to make any resolutions about how I am going to improve this as this will just add more stress to an already flat out stressed human being.

It is seriously a tough journey in education at the moment because of the need for massive change to raise student achievement, a complete pedagogical shift and system changes to support all of this. We should be winding up and celebrating our year except we are not, we are too exhausted and have lists of things to do before we can pack up and go home for the year.

Change is so important  to help reach each students potential and raise their achievement levels in a personalised, authentic way. There is so much that goes with this, along with teaching our students how to operate in a new environment where their voice is much more important than it ever has been. I celebrate this. It is hard however to celebrate my profession when it drains me and makes it so hard to find a balance between work and my family life. We, in the profession, are terrible at looking after ourselves in even small ways  like having lunch, sitting down in a place that comforts us. A relaxing morning tea and lunch is rarely possible. Then we have the added distraction of a media and government who don’t support or celebrate the efforts put in by so many amazing individuals.

It makes me rethink my position and whether I want to continue doing the work I do. This was particularly highlighted to me when I watched my neighbour being carried away in an ambulance because he was seriously ill. Life is so short, how do we take care of ourselves in this profession. We all know what we need to do. We just don’t do it.

Anyone reading this blog, who is not in education, will not empathise with a teacher feeling this because of the so called school holidays. I would not be able to do this job without the holidays, this is a time when my family find their mum, grandma and partner and receive quality and quantity of time with her. A person who is able to do the things that makes her a whole person, the right person the authentic person that I strive daily for my students to be the same. I also work a great deal in this so called holiday.

I don’t know the answer. What I do know is that I will try for another year and see how this goes. We are doing amazing things in my school and student achievement is at the heart of it. We are also building the capacity of our relationships with our Maori families. These are things to celebrate.

Maybe I am just burnt out and done.

 

Melanie M

 

Fuel for Success

Leadership Values and Beliefs

My Leadership Values and Beliefs as they are today demonstrate a great deal of growth and understanding from me. My journey this year has at times being challenging as I have questioned myself about being a leader and becoming a principal. I basically missed having the responsibility of my own classroom and the rewards that brings. When I was challenged on this I decided that being a leader of learning was a priority for me. This gave me more focus and direction and less distraction and confusion about what the hell I was doing.

My Leadership Values and Beliefs

  • Grow leaders in teachers and students
  • Build capacity in making a difference and leading change
  • Provoke the thinking of the leaders around me with innovative practice and pedagogy
  • Identify, understand and value the aspirations of my learning community with a particular focus on our Maori community and increasing the achievement of our akonga

More Surprises

More reflection on my 2015 professional inquiry

At one point this year our teachers felt like they were in the pit and were struggling with some of our student’s  not managing themselves in this environment. As a team we thought that it would be time to define the different types of learners we had in our collaborative team. We decided we had three types and lined this up with the SOLO framework. The teachers also had discussions with the students and students identified where they belonged. Within this SOLO framework

Multi structural – Managed Learners

Relational – Self Managed Learners

Extended Abstract – Self Directed Learners.

The three are distinctively different and require a level of skill to work within. These skills need to be taught, modelled and practiced daily for them to become part of a daily routine. This is a work in progress.

The teachers identified our managed group as having all our target students and also complained that these students were disrupting the class by being noisy, off task, disorganised and often destructive of a breakout space we had available to the students.

I had a discussion with these students –  In a summary the target/managed students thought it was the rest of the class that was disrupting their learning by being noisy and off task, they wanted quiet spaces to go to and they wanted their teacher to be available more for them to talk to, they made reference to their teachers time always being taken up with the others students who were being, in their words, ‘naughty’. They also thought that they would be more comfortable with the teacher telling them what to do instead of having to write their own timetable. This surprised all of us and immediately things were put in place to support these learners – a managed timetable was created and time each morning was given to them to explain what the timetable was for the day and also gave them a chance to make decisions about their day with their teachers support. The teachers also ensure these students are listened to more consistently and were given them positive specific praise, praising them for the behaviours the students identified they needed to work on. When they get distracted they are to do what our group Expert, Harry, said he does

‘Ignore and focus on what I am Doing’

So even though we are aiming for student agency for our learners we know this will be at different levels for all of them.

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